Late night thoughts.

1:00:00 AM



Not sure if there is anyone out there like me, always can't sleep at night and start thinking about future or nonsense. I'm a quite an emotional person actually, especially when I'm alone at night. Peoples around me love me alot and treated me as a princess so it makes me even weaker HAHAHA.


I tears quite often at night ... when I think about DEAD. I'm so scared of losing someone around me. Family, Bf, friends and etc. Times passes so fast after age 20, I don't know why. I'm starting to feel that my parents are really getting older and older. I'm so afraid one day they will really leave me. We don't say I Love You to each other but I do really care about them. They are really so important to me. I am not used into telling them or anyone but I do keep them for myself, it's because I don't really expose my inner feelings to others...


Dead is something natural, a must to everyone, not an exception but no matter how many times you face that you will still feel sad and heartbroken. Even by imagining it I can truly feel the pain and sad.


I always said that I, myself is a Overthinker and it never change, also it won't change. You know what? Sometimes if anyone is not yet back home, late or whatever, I will start to think, is there anything happening to him or her and then I start worrying or cry. I know I'm kinda stupid! But I really can't stop myself from being that silly! Maybe they protected me so well and I need them so much or I rely on them too much?


I'm not scared that I can't live alone or no money or whatever, it's just that I don't want to lose them. I want to be with them forever eventhough we might always argue lol. I also think about my future sometimes which I think my future is unknown, even myself don't even know what I really want. :S  I also think about what if someone climb into my house late at night, who should I save first? Eventhough I can't fight HAHA. Besides, I'm also very scared of one day I can't breath anymore HAHAHA. What will happen to someone after he or she die is still an unknown! I really hate things that I can't control or can't even imagine. I just think that I will be very suffering if I can't breath =________=


I do think about alot lot lot! Mostly the separation with my love one. :(  I don't know why there are all in a negative way!!!!


Sometimes I will really emo without reason and just feel like crying, just like today.




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